Somalia and the Creatures Being Farmed There

So there you have it: there is nothing to see. The epiphenomenon ‘Farmaajo’ is no longer the 1st minister of the monstrous TFG of Somalia. Although ‘Farmaajo’ looks like a Somali man, talks like a Somali man, and is apparently beloved by the Somalis at large—the Somalis are not human, so they have no need for a figurehead like ‘Farmaajo’.

You see, Somalia is a territory which is currently being exploited by two principle farmers—and I apologise to all conventional farmers for my use of language here—in their quest for greater productivity and enhanced yields in the form of cold hard cash. The principle farmers in question here are known by the names of Museveni and Meles, although they have been known to hide behind the corporate names such as IGAD, the AU, and the ‘International Community’.

The farm itself—the bountiful land of Somalia—is so preposterously productive that that our farmers guard it jealously, even from the strange idea that the creatures being farmed (the once proud Somalis) may develop independent thoughts such as thinking about managing their own affairs. You see the Somalis—thinking that they are human—sometimes dream about managing their own affairs. This only amuses the farmers Museveni and Meles—the latter is getting old and has grown rich from his tenure as the chief farmer in the Somali territory. In fact, Meles is still the go to guy with respect to the fine art of getting the best out of the Somali territory: he is famous for giving long lectures on the subject, even though the majority his brutal farmhands had been kicked out of Somalia a few years ago. 

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